If Looks Could Kill
by WhenInDoubtSleep
Summary: In times like this, the truth can rewrite the past and alter the future. In an attempt to find herself amidst the deceptive lies and horrible truths, she finds Draco Malfoy instead. She honestly just wants to make it out of the year alive...and maybe with a few less kisses from the blond git. Love story set during the sixth year at Hogwarts.
1. Hogwarts Express

I was eleven when I recieved my acceptance letter to there, I am a pure blood, and my name is Scarlett Selvin. Most people stay out of my way because...let me put it this way, I dare you to find someone fiestier than I am.

As you probably know, I was sorted into a house (as were the rest of the first years). I wanted to be in Slytherin or Gryffindor because those were the houses my parents belonged to. My mother was a brave Gryffindor with a heart of solid gold, and my father a Slytherin whose ambition set him apart. I grew up in an environment that led me to believe that every house was as good as the others. So yes, I do mean that either way I'll make friends from other houses. I glanced around the hall. There were hundreds of teenagers, and I was a bit overwhelmed, but I kept my composure of course. I was taught that at a young age. It is always necessary to keep your cool.

"Scarlett Selvin." The lady read off my name in her simple, elegant voice. I felt almost out of place when I listened to it. I'm was born in the outstanding country of America so most of these accents made me sound like a pirate or something. I strode confidently to the front, smirking while I sat on the chair.

The sorting hat was large, and it smelled a bit weird to me, draping to cover my eyes. The voice was low and secretive almost as though it held the fate of the world in its palms...even though hats technically don't have palms...whatever.

"You are intelligent, a true sign of a ravenclaw; you like to learn, striving to be the smartest. But your bravery shines through... you are well known for your courage, and you have been through a lot. Although your sly, ambitious personality is strong and overpowering. You wouldn't fit with the ravenclaws or the Gryffindor so it must be SLYTHERIN!" I felt then as if I had done my daddy proud as I stood up with a large smile on my face from the brilliant news I had just received.

A slytherin girl, just like my father. I closed my eyes and told my dad the news, imagining him beaming and hugging me tight, his eyes matching mine in color. He nodded. "I'm proud, kiddo. Keep up the great work. I love you." I heard him say. My eyes fluttered open, and I was welcomed back to reality by the sights and sounds of an excited great hall.

I smiled smugly as the table dressed in green and silver erupted with cheers. I turned and walked confidently down to the table. I sat next to a stunning boy who's hair was platinum blonde. His eyes were silver and mysterious while his skin was creamy and pale. I didn't like being this close to him; he gave me a bad vibe. I shivered violently, and the boy looked at me, his confusion showing through. I was careful not to make eye contact. I just picked at my meal and kept glancing at the boy. He seemed preoccupied, but I didn't mind that he wasn't paying attention to me. After I ate, I walked over to my best friend as well as my new friend. They were all staring at me.

I didn't understand what was happening or why they were looking at me like that. Rivalry was friendly, right? The house you were placed in didn't really matter...did it? My head was swarming with questions, but I just closed my eyes. It's going to be okay, I thought.

"I can't believe you're in slytherin" My friend Ron said through his food. I just shrugged. Why did it matter, I mean it only meant that I was sly and ambitious, what's so wrong about that? Nothing in my opinion; he's just biased. Everyone in his family has been a gryffindor. I honestly don't think he deserves it. He should be a Hufflepuff. No one cares about them. I mean I love Ron...but still.

They all looked at , me expectantly, as if I was supposed to say "no, I didn't. It was just a practical joke, I'm a gryffindor." but I didn't, I sat quiet for a few minutes before opening my mouth to speak to the people who called themselves my friends.

"It's not all that bad." I replied. Hermione smiled, I could tell it was fake. She was trying not to offend me, and it wasn't working. I felt like they all hated me. And just because I wear green and silver. That's almost as bad as racism.

I clenched my jaw, looking over each of them slowly, noting their different expressions. "whatever." I said under my breath, almost ready to storm away from the three children.

"Yes, well now we shall not see you as often." Hermione muttered. The whole time Harry was staring at me in disbelief; or was it a look of disgust. I really didn't want him to hate me for being a slytherin. Why did they care, it's not like they were the slytherins. They didn't have to deal with it or anything. Ugh...that's just plain angry-making.

I nodded. "but slytherins and griffyndors have defense against the dark arts together this year...so we will be seeing eachother. And of course, hermione, you said that we could be study partners." I reminded the. Hermione nodded, about to speak when Harry interrupted her.

"Well we must be going to our dormitories soon so you best go back with them." Harry said shooting a glance at my house's table. His tone was harsh, and cold. I nodded once and turned on my heels as to return to my table. Whatever's bothering him...he can deal with it.

5 YEARS LATER

"Are you all excited to be returning to Hogwarts?" I ask my three best friends as we sit on the Hogwarts Express once again. We have gone through the same routine each year, but this year something feels off. The mood has changed in our compartment, and everyone seems to be almost somber. They look nervous and secretive. I know that they do not trust me kowing a lot because of my house. It's stupid, really, but they find it necessary. It pisses me off.

We have remained best friends, and i hav even been dubbed the unofficial fourth member of the golden trio. We have always been inseparable best mates, but I'm not an idiot. I know when I'm not wanted...like right now. I'm not wanted right now.

"Of course we are, well at least I am." Hermione replies happily, nodding at me. Harry just stares out the window. "What's wrong, Harry? You've been awfully quiet today" She adds. I am extremely glad that she has asked. It was bothering me as well. He's never this closed off. His arms are crossed firmly across his chest, and his face is downcast.

Harry has been under a lot of stress, especially with voldemort being back and all. He is pretty much being hunted like an animal, and that scares me. Harry is the brother that I so often need. I stare at him intently, wondering if he will give an honest answer.

"I just have a lot to think about." I am entirely unconvinced by his answer. I look around not expecting Ron to speak, considering his mouth is completely stuffed with a cauldron cake.

"Sorry, mate." he says loudly, giving me a perfect view of the snack. That's my best friend...the pig. I roll my blue eyes at the sight of him. He's crazy most of the time.

"Well I think I shall ease some tension and go change into my robes." I say rather cheerfully as I stand up, smoothing out my sweater and exiting our compartment. My timing (as always) could not be any better. The exact second that I exit, I run into none other than the infamous Draco Malfoy. His body is hard as it collides with my own. He is nearly a head taller then I, so I hit his chest. Wonderful, Right?

That is complete and udder sarcasm, by the way. This is the biggest fucking prat in our entire school.

The tormentor.

The idiot.

The...the king of narcissism himself, and god, I can't stand him.

"Watch it Selvin." he says, adding his all too famous glare. I roll my eyes in an exaggerated manner. He has an ego the size of a New York City skyscraper...And I, for one, cannot stand it. He has serious daddy issues or something. There's always something bothering him. Sometimes I just want to know what crawled into his ass and died. I mean, seriously? He is always glaring or smirking, and he's never nice... to anyone.

"Maybe if you paid attention to anything but yourself then you would have noticed I was exiting my compartment." I reply coolly and venomously. He nods once and walks straight past me. Ugh, why is he so immature? I honestly don't even think Ron is as bad as he is

I return to my compartment in my green and black robe. I look drop-dead-gorgeous in green and am actually glad I landed a slot as a slytherin, unlike my friends. They still think that I deserve to be in gryffindor, and I roll my eyes at the thought. I belong in my house. It feels like home down in the dungeons.

"What did Malfoy want?" Harry asks me with a twinge of jealousy.

"Because if he was bothering you, I swear I will go and curse him." he added angrily. There's my Harry: protective and brave. If I didn't know him better I would think he liked me. But he likes Ginny. Anyone can tell. They are absolutely cute together. I enjoy the way they looked at each other. It is precious.

He is constantly smiling at her, and she, of course has been completely enamored with him since before they had even met eachother. She was a fangirl, and he was totally into her.

"Nothing, just couldn't focus on the world around him. He only cares about himself; I swear his ego is as big as America." I say with dramatic hand motions, rolling my eyes.

"He ran into me and then told me to watch where I was going. Then I told him to shove off and he did...well actually I told him to pay attention to what he was doing." I shrug. Harry nods, he still looks kind of angry.

Then the train comes to a halt and everyone exits hastily. We take our time. Well, we kind of leave Harry behind because he had left a little before the express stopped and he hadn't come back. I wonder what he went to do. Hopefully he didn't go and bother Malfoy or something. He probably did...

But of course I trust Harry to keep himself alive, he's done pretty well so far in this life, although it's questionable sometimes,

inside I leave my friends and strut over to the Slytherin table. I sit next to Kailey Kendrix, she was in a few of my classes last year and she was pretty cool. I enjoy how sweet and happy she always is. It's refreshing when you're surrounded with people of my variety...we tend to be asses...well except for those of us like me. We're bad asses.

There is a difference.

"Hey Scarlett, how was your summer?" kailey asks me. I smile at her kindly, and she smiles back at me, appearing happy that I decided to come and sit with her. I honestly don't mind spending time with her, she really is a doll.

"It was good. I didn't do much, just went back home to the states" She nods, smiling warmly. She's really quiet a lot of the time, and I kinda like that about her. She's never bothersome. I trust her a lot. And that doesn't happen very often.

"how was yours, babe?" I ask her, genuinely listening for her reply.

"Well well if it isn't Miss Scarlett Selvin and Kailey Kendrix." Zabini sneers, showing his vile teeth. He should really look into dental work. I sigh deeply, scrunching up my nose. If there's anyone I hate as much as I hate Malfoy, it's Blaise, and that is not an overexageration.

"What is it you want?" I ask impatiently. I do not have time for his bullshit so I sound kind of furious. I'm surprised he still messes with me.

"I want you to move out of my way. That's my seat, right next to Draco." I turn confusedly to see none other than Draco Malfoy is sitting next to me. I shudder, and move as far away from the boy as I can get. I don't like getting too close to him.

"Well too bad, go sit with someone else or go beat up a first year; you seem to like doing that." I sneere right back at him. He frowns at me. A look of wrath was present on his face.

"Look Selvin that is MY SEAT, SO GET THE HELL OFF OF IT." he yelled rather angrily. I didn't move.

"WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?!" he yelled. I kind of like riling him up like this. It barely took anything to piss him off. He has mommy issues...

"Look Zabini, I don't care what you do, but you will not come over and speak that way with me, I am not some little first year that you can push around, so go and sit somewhere else. Or I solemnly swear I will curse you until you know where you stand with me. Get the picture? Now get the hell away from me." I spit angrily. he grumbles something and walks over to kick Pansy out of her seat so he could sit there, I swear if there is anyone I hate more than Malfoy, it's Blaise Zabini. Did I already say that? Yeah...I think I might have mentioned it.

I turn back to bailey, and she nodded. "it was fine. I had a small summer romance with a boy from London. He's a muggle. I'll show you some pictures." she Promises me.

We got quite a few new students this year. I smile, realizing that they were the future of slytherin cuz we only had two years left. That makes me feel sick to my stomach; I cannot go out into the wizarding world while the dark lord was about. I just...will not do it. He will want me to join him, and dire fuse to do it. I will not make the same mistake as my daddy did. I shudder at the thought.

After dinner I walk down to the slytherin common room to see who I would be rooming with. It turns out to be Kailey. Jenna Thompson, and Lillyan Marsh came into our room so we could hang out for a little while before we went to sleep. I sit on my bed and in came all three of them, we are all friends, but my best friends were somewhere in the Gryffindor Common room. They all speak in hushed, excited voices about our sixth year. I just wanted to sleep; I was incredibly tired. And finally the lights are turned off and I am consumed by the darkness.

~author's note

I have finally edited this chapter (for the fourth time, might I add)

And thank you all so much for reading it. It is an absolute honor to have hit 60k. You are the most amazing readers ever. It feels really strange deleting tge first athors note that i ever wrote on anything, but it was time for me to write a new message to my lovely fans. Keep being precious and beautiful. I cast Candice Accola as Scarlett. Hope you love it all. although I would love it if you all would:

VOTE

COMMENT

MESSAGE ME. I DO NOT BITE.

Peace and love,

Alex


	2. Memories

I am standing there, deep in thought. It is only my second year at hogwarts, the greatest school in the world, and I love almost every single second of it. I am taking my sweet time, traipsing down the stairs to the dungeon, making my way to my dormitory. After a bit, I feel the air change, and I turned around, seeing a very familiar blonde haired boy, Draco Malfoy. He gives me one hasty glance, and I don't quite understand why he is staring at me that way, with a look of complete disgust. I swallow thickly, my eyebrows drawing together.

"Watch it, mudblood." he mumbles angrily, his cold, silver eyes flashing. I gape at him, searching for the words. How does he not recognize me? We have classes together. We are in the same house. And we frequently pass each other in the common room. He was sitting next to me at dinner nearly every night.

The realization hit me like a ton of bricks. Malfoy doesn't recognize me. I do not phase him; I am just another stupid human in the stupid world of stupid people. It hurts me, and I can feel my eyes begin to water with bitter tears. I clench my jaw, giving him a once over. He has some nerve, forgetting Scarlett Selvin.

"I'm in slitherin, and I'm a pureblood." I say, trying for defiance but my voice seems quiet and unsure. I mentally curse myself for being so stupid. I sound small and afraid, and he scoffs at me. I don't know why he always acts that way, so cold and heartless. He really isn't a heartless boy...he's too young to be heartless. Maybe he's just been through too much, like me. I understand how deeply the emotional trauma can cut a person. It's like a knife.

"Well you better move now, or I'll push you down the stairs." He says before making true to his words, pushing me to the side, my head collided sharply with the wall, and it hurt so much that I helped, staring at the blonde boy, my mouth agape. My head is throbbing, no, pounding when I put my hand up to feel the dark wet liquid. But Malfoy doesn't care, he was storming down the steps, unphased. I try to call him back but he couldn't hear me. i begin to panic. I need to get to the infirmary. I take one single step, moaning when I feel it everywhere, the pain nearly unbearably. I slipp on the step, feeling gravity tug me down, and I collapsed onto the stairs, where I hit my nose. I groan and lose my consciousness. The steps are cold underneath my limp body, and I black out.

I am in the infirmary then, Harry is holding my hand and smiling at me. His eyes area clear green and kind, and I feel safe. I like that he has always had this sort of effection for me. He treats me like a goddess or a princess. He treats me how every girl deserves to be treated. He is humming a song that I didn't know, and as always, he is way off key. Harry is definitely not a musician.

"Scarlett? What happened, love? I found you passed out and you were bleeding. It looked like you hit your head, did you slip?" he sounds concerned, and I just giggle at that, shaking my head. I reach out, putting my pointer finger on his lips, telling him to be quiet. I find everything absolutely hilarious. After a minute, my hand falls, and I drift back into my favorite kind of blackness. The empty kind.

When i wake, I am standing near the lake. It is cold outside, and I smile softly, smelling the fresh autumn air. It smells like falling leaves and pumpkin juice. It is only a moment before I feel something collide with my arm, throwing my off balance and forcing me to the ground. I once again hit my head, but this time I stand up and follow him. My anger is boiling inside of me, and I can't believe he would do this to me again. I will not let him hurt me. I cannot just let him get away with it, his stupid little "I'm too good for everyone" attitude is driving me mad, and I will not take it! I'm Scarlett Selvin! I can take anyone anytime, and I'd like to see him try to stop me.

"I just got out of the infirmary because of you, and I don't plan on going back." I say angrily, making sure he could hear the venom in my voice, and the pain behind my words. I am practically on a rampage as I tear after him quickly. My fists are clenched, and my teeth are gritted. I haven't been that angry in a long time. It's strange when you can feel your blood boiling beneath your own pale, fragile skin.

"just leave me alone." he looks scared. And turned suddenly,

"Stupify" He said, and then walked off leaving me alone. Ugh, he should just grow up. I am left alone until my memory transformed taking the shape of a new one.

I am then in the defense against the dark arts classroom, being hit with numerous spells, all cast by Draco. All I can hear is a distant ' that is enough'. The words are said over and over and over again, and it hurts. I feel like i am being pulled apart limb from limb, and the words are on loop in my head, torturing me for what felt like an endless eternity of being punished. I begin to wonder what i had ever done to deserve such pain, and then I wake. My breathing is heavy and constricted and I have one hand against my heart.

I am completely startled as all the memories flood back to me. It was like a heavy quilt, and I feel suffocated as the tormenting memories settle into my head, leaving me restless. No matter how deep I sleep, I still have the dreams. The taunting memories that smirk at me...that challenge me. The memories that try to hold me back.

So I walk down to the common room and sit on the couch. It is cold and leather and I find it quite comforting. Soon my eyes are heavy, and I am falling victim to my painful memories as the dreams begin again.

I can tell that tears were staining my damned cheeks while I laid there on cold black leather, trying to escape the demon that is hiding inside of my head, clawing his way out memory by memory.

~author's note

This chapter is kinda sorta filler-esque, but hey! Dream sequence. Chapter three will be up super soon, and I absolutely love you all for reading. So hey, comment and tell me your favorite character so far? Or your predictions? Or any sort of suggestions and/or feedback

ADDITION: So I'm going to add that this book will get better I promise :/ reading my old writing makes me kind of cringe a bit...I mean I'm finally getting around to fixing this book up a bit! Maybe I'll start rewriting it!?

ADDITION: I have begun to rewrite it. Tell me what you think below!

Well...I guess I should keep editing for a bit, but I am tired.

And as fucking always!

Love ya

~Alex


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